Educational Materials Pass Test

16 Oct

All new books for elementary school students have received wide acclaim throughout the Kuiper Asteroid Belt. The Books, which were tested at a school on the dwarf planet Haumea, are programed with artificial intelligence microchips. The chips gauge the educational level of the reader and automatically adjust the information presented to increase learning.  If the audio book was originally programmed with a simple poem such as:

  • Mary had a little lamb,   Its fleece was white as snow,  And everywhere that Mary  went,  The lamb was sure to go.

When a first grader reads it, the poem would sound something like this:

  •  Mary – the usual English form of Maria, which was the Latin form of the Greek names Μαριαμ (Mariam) and Μαρια (Maria)  originally derived from Latin meaning ‘star of the sea’, Was the owner of a small vertebrate land mammal,  commonly known as a lamb

We won’t bore you with the rest.

Newswire visited the school where the testing took place and we caught up with two first graders playing ball on the playground:

Cyd: “Reginald, would you be so kind as to toss me the ball.”
Rege: “Why certainly Cedric. Here you are.”
Cyd: “Thank you old bean.”

Teachers and parents alike are praising the books as an asset to the educational program. One father told Newswire the children are using what they’ve learned at home as well.  “When I told my son to eat his vegetables he tried to get out of it by saying that the Nobel Laureate De Brogile managed to compose his dissertation on the theory of quanta without the assistance of broccoli.”


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